My boys are wanters. They see toys, snacks, movies, clothes — you name it, they want it. The same could probably be said for my husband, only the toys he wants are on a grander scale, and much more expensive. But, seeing as how the kids want anything and everything that’s put in their line of sight, it’s becoming truly hard to satisfy them. They’re always thinking about what they’re getting next.
Thus, we’ve been trying to get them to understand the difference between wanting what’s placed right in front of you (as TV advertising is all too good at), and really wanting something, and therefore, working and saving for it.
The boys now have their own wallets, and are at the point where they know that having money is good (because they can buy more toys with it), but are far from appreciating it, or managing it well.
To help them out, we’ve started giving them an allowance to not only teach them the value of money, but more importantly, how to handle it.
When I asked my youngest son how many quarters were in a dollar, he answered, “Just one.”
“So one quarter equals one dollar?” I asked, hoping he would catch on.
“Yes, that’s correct,” he said with confidence.
OK, so we have a long way to go, but at least it’s a start.
The boys now have an allowance of $3 a week — three single bills, for three different jars — each boy has a save, spend and give jar. (I don’t quite know where the bank thought I was going when I went in and asked for $60 in one dollar bills.)
Winter can be an overcast time in more ways than one. Not only do we get to start and end our days in darkness, but it also messes with our internal circadian clocks. So it’s really no wonder the gloom of the cold leaves us with a lack of motivation, and a deep desire to raid the cupboards.
Compounding the problem, is the fact that winter leaves parents (and teachers), with only intermittent outdoor playtime, making it hard to occupy children’s wildly creative minds.
Yes, this time of year, my boys certainly have a surplus of energy; enough to go around in fact. Of course, I feel just the opposite. I want to slip into my pajamas and crawl under a blanket and hibernate until spring … make that summer.
What I would give to have an ounce of their energy … just one ounce.
But since the boys have taken it upon themselves to eat me out of house and home, and literally destroy everything in their path as they do so, I’ve had to come out of hiding and push myself to keep their innovative minds active.
I’ve stocked up on basically everything and anything I can to keep them busy. I’ve bought Play-Doh, tools, glue, markers, books, board games, movies, downloaded Kindle games, and even gave them a camera. We’ve painted pottery, visited relatives, and run laps around the basement.
And when these activities get old to them, I continue looking for new ones, even in unusual places.
I’ve had them be assistant chefs, and even tricked them into helping with the chores.
“Hey kids, want to play with my Swiffer Sweeper?” (Just make sure to put a dry sweeping cloth on first. Then let them go to town.)
Like I said, I will do anything to keep them busy.
The idea of shopping for many women (and some men) makes thoughts of sugarplums dance in your head. And with so many avenues to do it — through windows, online, in a catalog, and physically standing in a store — this is undoubtedly the best time of year for it. In fact, the National Retail Federation forecasts holiday sales to be at $630.5 billion this year.
Hold up, I want to change that image in your head from a beautifully-wrapped Christmas gift, to a buggy full of food. OK, this time, I’m talking grocery shopping — yes, perhaps a little less appealing.
Grocery shopping with your children; I’ve now made good thoughts disappear altogether — the sugarplums have left the building — and you’re probably hunkering down, cringing, and trying to crawl underneath the table.
Let’s just say, it’s a subject we don’t typically like to discuss.
Trying to brush an unwilling child’s teeth is like trying to wrestle a gator with clinched jaws. And you better watch out — they can (and do) bite.
After a lecture from the dentist about how we really need to be making the boys brush their teeth twice a day, I began to get worried.
How was I going to get this done?
The boys no longer do things just because I say they should. They question everything and anything you tell them to do. They must ask the whys, and the what ifs.
But why must we brush our teeth? What happens if you don’t eat your vegetables? Why do I have to wash my hands again after I use the bathroom?
They certainly keep me on my toes with so many questions. I now have to play out the “what happens if we don’t do this” scenarios for them. I appreciate their inquisitive minds, but it’s exhausting.
And for some reason, they don’t always believe the answers I give them. (Because you know, I’m so often trying to lead them astray.)
So your family is piling up the laundry, dirty dishes are waiting for you in the sink, and your children ran through the mud and tracked it through the house. You’d think this would all put you over the edge, driving you into the depths of despair.
You will never be able to get it all done, let alone have any spare time for yourself.
But you’ve got to put away these negative thoughts, and look at things in a new light. Just tell your kids (and your spouse) to go at it … get in there and make those messes. Cheer them on even.
As the debris start accumulating, you stay relaxed and take it all in stride. After all, you know how to keep your cool. In fact, snacks and juice all around! Anything for your family.
A mother is naturally the caregiver in the family. She has the kiss to cure a boo-boo, the hug that dries away the tears, the cake that makes you forget your worries, and a song to send you to sleep. A mother takes on the role of being the rock, the mast carrying the sails and the glue that holds everyone together.
You end up doing so much for your children, it’s hard to know where to draw the line. You want your children to be independent, but you also want what’s best for them. And sometimes, a mother knows best. OK, we always know best. It’s difficult to let your children make their own decisions – especially when you know they are the wrong ones. It becomes hard not to be a bit of a smother.
Now that I live the life of a leisurely stay-at-home mom/trophy wife (ha!), my husband and I joke all the time that I married him for his money. But if you know us at all, you know this is far from true. The man I married was actually unemployed. In fact, he quit his job working at a horse stable just so we could go on our honeymoon. But we didn’t fear for our future, we were young, blinded by hope, and living on love.
And it’s a good thing that’s how it all began, because here we are … with our one income family surviving a union refinery strike … we are back to living, and surviving, on that love.
