So, I did well. I made it through the entire day, keeping myself extra busy … and I didn’t even cry. I’ll admit, I might have held back a tear or two, but I’m brave, and I certainly didn’t want to make him worry even more.
Standing there in the gym, I now felt anxious. Where was he? I really just wanted to grab him and get out of this crowd. I let out a sigh of relief when I finally saw his teacher entering the gym with a little line of heads right behind her.
But the instant I saw him, my eyes suddenly swelled with tears. I could no longer hold them back, and a few gently rolled down my cheeks. I wiped them away as quickly as I could, before anyone could see them … other people might see those tears and think I am one of those crazy, attached moms. You know the kind who’s holding on to the kid, as he says, “It’s OK mom, you can let go now.”
I’m certainly not one of THOSE moms.
But it was the sight of my little boy that overwhelmed me so much … my little boy, who suddenly looked so grown up.
This morning when I dropped him off, he was just a child. But now, looking at him, he seemed older, taller and changed. Yes, it’s obvious; he is no longer my baby boy, but officially a Kindergartner now. It seems to suit him too.
But that’s how change happens sometimes … just like that … overnight.
As my little man saw his little brother and me, his face lit up in a smile. OK, so he still thinks his mom picking him up is good news (at least for now). I won’t ever forget the way he looked at me at that moment. He hasn’t been that happy to see me in a long time, and it simply melted my heart as he put his hand in mine.
Maybe school won’t be so bad after all. Maybe time away will make us appreciate each other all the more.
Change is hard for everyone. But I think it’s especially hard for parents. Our kids change so much each and every day — they get bigger, stronger, more opinionated. Sometimes you turn around and wonder what happened to that sweet little baby you once had?
Life is happening right in front of me, and there is nothing I can do to slow it down or alter it.
But I’ve realized changes in life are like trying new recipes. Sometimes, you may have to go back and make a few tweaks here and there until everything is just as you want it to be. But you’ve just got to go for it, branch out, and try something new. Who wants to eat the same old stuff all the time?
So, the next day, I let my little man get out of the car and walk into that school all by himself. He’s ready to take on the world without me.
I won’t be too far away, though. I’ll be standing on the sidelines, watching him achieve new goals, and yes, always there to hold his hand when he needs me.
